This is my first reflection for the Gratia Vobis Ministries daily reflection series. The invitation to contribute surprised me. I accepted, but honestly had doubts and fear, and almost declined. I thought someone with more knowledge, experience, and insight should do this instead. And, I still have a lot to learn about our faith. Admittedly, I have not read the whole Bible yet.
Right now, my evangelization relies more on testimony, zeal, and conviction than theology, but I’m slowly trying to fill that gap. Faith formation programs like “That Man Is You” (TMIY) and Exodus 90 and community are helping me see the path to heaven more clearly, understand my role as a child of God, and live accordingly. My wife, Justine, tried to lead me to God while we were dating almost 30 years ago, encouraging Mass and confession, but I was barely lukewarm. My vices took priority over salvation. About 3 and a half years ago, Jesus met me where I was, and I decided to start following. Now I want to make up for lost time with Him.
Who am I serving?
A fellow parishioner and close friend asked if I could help our priest, Father John Bosco, shop for winter gear; it’s his first winter in Canada. Justine and I happily took him out and had a great time. After our trip, as we were about to drop him off, and before we got out of the car, he asked if I, or our family, would like to write reflections for the Gratia Vobis Ministries’ website. I was nervously overthinking at hyper-speed; he couldn’t see it through my smile. The day before, I read some reflections on the page and was impressed by the contributors, so my immediate thought was comparison: “I’m not good enough.” I could have asked for time to think it over before deciding. That might have been wise and patient; those are virtues, right? I would advise my kids to do that. But I didn’t do that; I said yes after a couple of seconds. What happened?
Partly because I’m more comfortable saying yes than no; fear of judgment, ego, and pride contribute to this. I know this is not what God wants, but it’s true, and I’m working on it. So, although my yes is partial, I want it to come solely from the gifts and fruits of the Holy Spirit, a fully virtuous yes. A yes that firmly trusts and rests on the foundation of God’s divine gifts of faith, hope, and love. A yes that comes from surrendering to His will, not from the discomfort of a no, not from pride. Like Mother Mary’s fiat, like Jesus surrendering to His Father’s will. If I am to imitate Christ and be a servant, are my ‘yesses’ for God, or more for myself? When I recognize it is in vain, do I will the good for myself? In other words, do I love myself by forgiving myself, repenting, and trying to correct it? Just as we are called to love others, by willing their good, forgiving them, and calling them to repent.
Path to Heaven
Today’s First Reading (Philippians 2:5-11) is about surrender, humility, sacrifice, and obedience as a servant. Today’s Gospel is an invitation (Luke 14:15-24), a gift God wants us to accept, not reject. God also gave us gifts He wants us to use, not waste: the Holy Spirit and the virtues (cardinal and theological). They are the keys to surrender and to accept His invitation.
What keeps me from these gifts? Are my “yesses” in vain or humility? How do I accept His invitation? When do I reject His invitation and prioritize the world and comfort? My path to heaven is paved with these questions. To stop reflecting, praying, and acting on these questions is to walk off that path. Praise the Lord Jesus Christ for lighting the path with His Word and Holy Church.
NB:
We welcome the Devera Family (father and mother with their two daughters) to the team of contributors for our daily reflections. We appreciate their contribution and pray the Holy Spirit to inspire them more as they share their faith with us.
I think you did a very good job with this first reflection. Keep up the good work.