Death to Self

“Unless a grain of wheat falls to the earth and dies, it remains only a single grain.  But if it dies, it yields a rich harvest.” –John 12:24

Today’s Gospel reading invites us into the very heart of the Christian faith.  Jesus tells us that unless a grain of wheat “falls to the earth and dies,” it remains only itself; but if it dies, it yields much.  The image has become so familiar to our imagination that we might fail to grasp the powerful claim being made.  How to make it real?  For me, this passage recalls vividly one particular childhood memory.

Each Life, a Word

Many years ago, a few weeks after my grandmother had died, I was going to bed when I was struck with the distinct realization of her life’s significance.  I stood outside my bedroom, gazing for a long while at the mix of shadow and light on the floor, and I realized that it was only now, after my grandmother’s death, that the meaning of her life had been revealed.  Family dissension had clouded that meaning for many years, but now that she was gone, we had come to recognize her truly selfless nature.  Her life, I realized, had been like a word uttered upon the lips.  Only once a word is fully spoken does its meaning issue forth.  Perhaps every human life, I reasoned, was a word being uttered, yielding its meaning only at death.

Such has always been the claim of our Christian faith.  Sacrifice and death of self offer the gateway to true meaning, to resurrection.  Indeed, we all know this truth on the scale of daily life, too.  Whenever we sit down to write, for example, we allow ourselves to ‘die to the world’ in order to bring forth a gift of truth upon the page.  Caring for our children each day, too, is a constant process of dying to self so that new life might flourish in their souls.  All of this entails what St. John Paul II called “the law of the gift.”

Let us recall too, that today’s Gospel passage begins with the Greeks who come to Philip, telling him simply, “We wish to see Jesus.”  It is in response to this desire of the Gentiles that Jesus speaks of His imminent death, invoking the image of the grain of wheat which must die in order to generate food for the world.  Similarly, with arms outstretched upon the cross, in His death Jesus will gather all nations to Himself.

Jesus the Source of Meaning

Yet why?  To what end?

Quite simply, for the life of the world.  Christianity stands alone among the world religions in this regard.  It forges true meaning for each person through Jesus’ death on the cross.  Our lives which were hitherto meaningless because they ended in death now take on fresh, abundant significance because Christ’s death and resurrection have redeemed each one of us.  As St. John writes, “the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.”  God Himself, the Logos, became one of us so that He might reveal Himself to us and invite us into His divine life. 

It has been said that the Christian faith might be expressed most simply as Deus dixit, or, “God spoke.”  All that God could ever desire to tell us has been revealed, or spoken, in His Son.  Christ is the very Word of God, and thus his earthly life, from birth to His death and resurrection, is the utterance of that Word so that we might come to hear, know, and receive Him into ourselves.  That divine, ultimate meaning continues to resonate through each of us today who believe in Christ.

As we reflect upon this parable of the grain of wheat, that which in dying becomes a gift to the world, let us consider this point for reflection:  How has Christ’s death and resurrection given meaning to your life?  What harvest has He borne in you?  How has the dying grain of wheat become abundant in you? 

[Readings: 2 Cor 9:6-10; Jn 12:24-26]

Radhika Sharda, MD

Radhika Sharda is a practicing physician and a convert to the Catholic faith from a Hindu background. She has written a book of essays on literature, Savour, which may be found on Amazon. She lives in Raleigh, NC, with her three young boys.

1 Comments

  1. irene on August 10, 2021 at 11:06 am

    thank you for your words today. it help me in a deep way.

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